Sunday, October 26, 2008

It's A Bump, Not a Fork

Well, I'll be honest. I find I'm having a tough time and lacking some faith. I don't know what it is. I'm feeling rather unholy these days. I've never completely tripped off the stairway to heaven, but I've had my setbacks; it's the journey, not the destination, right? Can I possibly be any more corny?

In all seriousness, I kind of thought I was a little old for this kind of thinking and behavior. But handling five kids, house, a job, and all that goes with them in this day and age makes me feel worn out and spent at the end of every single day, for the past elevenish months. I don't think I'm postpartum, incredibly hormonal, yes.

I know life isn't supposed to be easy, but I'm really craving some down time. Believe me. Moving to Indonesia? I spent a good month reconsidering everything we were doing when we had to figure out the entire move ourselves, ship a dog safely to the tip of that tropical island, find out that hubby's job was going to be very, very tough, fight like crazy to keep my job, buy $3000.00 worth of anti malaria profilactics,.. Maybe I'm just FINISHED with having the feeling that everything I do I must put on cement boots to do it. How wonderful it is to stretch out both my arms at once and not have to heft a baby or two up and down stairs to run errands. You know that feeling, right?

So, I was listening to AM radio since it's so incredibly entertaining this close to an election, and it must have been the Hugh Hewitt show where a caller said, "it's important to remember it's just a bump in the road, not a fork." or something like that. How appropriate for me. (Especially as we are on the way to the Church trunk or treat and I get mad at the car at the stop sign in front of us who isn't letting a group of boys cross the road. "Let the children go, you freak!" Was that me yelling? When in the world did I get so angry? Did Jesus' mother ever have days like that? Or for that matter, my adopted patron saint, Monica - whose son Constantine she prayed for for more than 30 years before it all came to fruition? At least I meant well, right?)

So anyway, we have some very cute pictures that we'll post soon - right now hubby is 'putting the baby to bed' which is daddy talk for 'I'm checking out early - lock up the house! 'night!"

A bit of britghtness in my day is my friend Jerry's facebook quote that I am stealing and making my own too - "I'm a princess, you're a princess,... so who's going to milk the goats?" - Old Egyptian Proverb. Amazing that women have felt this way all through the ages,...

1 comment:

Teri said...

Oh, Karen - sigh.
I feel all that, too - and with less going on than you.
Who IS going to milk the goats? Not me--- I have enough to do!!!
I used to say "I need a break" so often that Kevin called me on it - but I still do. I wish I could figure out when I really need some time and when I need to buck up. Thanks for sharing what you're feeling - I know I'm not alone. And you're not either.