I'm so sorry I missed your call last night. I was really looking forward to talking to you since the last time we talked was Sunday night. It's tough for me, the iPhone, laptopped multitasking dervish to accept that fact that the Guatemalan jungle does not have an Internet connection and you have to share one cell phone with 200 paltry minutes between your 15 team members. But I can handle it.
I missed your call because I had to have all my faculties about me as I navigated the McTeacher Night at the local McDonald's, a crazed experience when both parents are available to handle the children; guerilla tactics were required for me to do this alone with five kids. But we had a successful visit - no one peed in the playplace and I only lost one child for a second as we were leaving. I still count five, so all is good.
What's going on, you ask? The usual. The B is a four year old singing sensation, unfortunately the lyric she chooses to sing over and over again is in the popular Kesha song and it goes like this: 'brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack' . As you can suspect, it really doesn't put me in a glowing light as I wheel her around the grocery store in a cart.
The big J got a few more brackets put on his braced teeth and hasn't eaten solid food in a couple of days now. He's been making smoothies and I think I've drilled it into his head that it is VERY important to put the cover on the blender before he hits the switch, and no, I don't think it is worth it to see what would happen if he didn't do that. For both my sanity, and his freedom's sake.
Z's friend finally found out that unlike what he thought, his daddy is not on a business trip but he and his mom got a divorce. This made Z sad to think about.
Then he asked me the question:"Uhm, mom, where is dad?"
"He's on a business trip. Really."
"In, the uh,.. jungle. Guatemala. Really."
"Soooo,.. is that why he hasn't called us?"
'Er,.. yes,.. he doesn't really have the capability to call us."
All the while the 13 year old is snickering and saying "Riiiiggght. The jungle. On a business trip."
Somehow everyone seems to need to go to the doctor while you are away, of course. This includes the dog.
Unfortunately no one stole my old beemer, so I had to finally pick it up at the shop. I was hoping it would be missing and I could use the insurance money to buy a nice, newer one. But I'll have to take a nap to continue with that little day dream.
Well, that's about it. I'm using your absences as an excuse to not cook and eat Trader Joe's prepared meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner. How much Brie cheese is too much Brie cheese, do you think?
Love and kisses,