Friday, February 13, 2009

Kettle Chips

So, I was in the grocery store the other day (okay, I go to the grocery store approximately every day), and I was grabbing food items and tossing them in the ol' cart. I had to stop by the 'healthy' section because my 9 year old is INFATUATED with Puffins. He loves birds in general, but especially Puffins. Followed by hawks, all sorts of boobies (yes, he is the one I hear screaming when we go to the zoo, "Look at all the Boobies!" And I don't freak because I know he is talking about the blue-footed ones.)

Why? fortheluvofgawd I don't know. I will surmise it began with a nasty bout of Croup back in '07 on Christmas Eve. Hubby hustled the kid into the ER at 11pm. After yucky treatments like Xrays, steroid shots and breathing treatments, it is the hospital's tradition to give kids a stuffed animal. Zach came home with a stuffed chicken. I attribute this whole craziness and the fact that I can look forward to my kid living in some tent made out of whale belly in the middle of the Arctic with a long beard and no family, to that stuffed chicken. Thanks so much, St. Peter's Hospital.

Anyways, back here in SoCal, I am grabbing the Puffin cereal. Which everyone else in the family will not eat because it has the label ORGANIC on it. That seems to be one of the golden rules around here. Leaf of three, leave it be. Red and black stripes, don't touch it. Organic, don't cross the lips.

So, then I spot the chips. I love chips, but I'm trying very hard to be good and not eat them. I love baked chips, and as long as I haven't had a real chip for about a month, I can trick myself into thinking they actually taste good. The baked tater ones? Especially great with onion dip you make with fat free plain yoghurt and french onion soup mix. And good for you. The baked corn ones? Rock with some veggie refried beans and fat free plain yoghurt. These can be a tasty lunch, folks, as long as your kids aren't looking.

So, I see they have baked Kettle chips. Kettle chips are no longer allowed in my house. When preggo with the last kid, I bought the darned things at Costco. I think my last 20 pounds of weight gain I can write a thank you note directly to the makers of the Kettle chips. So, I'm psyched they have the baked chips. I toss them in the cart.

I get home and begin unpacking the groceries. I unpack the Kettle chips. They have transformed from 'baked' to 'organic'. Don't you just hate that? When you mean to grab one thing, but a different thing is what you bring home? I do this all the time, but I usually can just blame it on kid distraction. This time I was alone. I think what may happen is people grab one thing, see something else they like better, and replace them. This is the only way I can square away why I sometimes come home with one white cheddar macaroni and cheese and one alfredo macaroni and cheese. The kids eat two boxes at a time. I mix them together, hoping no one will notice the difference. Oh, they notice.

So, dang it, now I have a bag of high caloric chips that I can't just leave on the kid snack shelf because they have that 'ORGANIC' label. Might as well put a Mr. Yuck sticker on it, they would have a better chance of being eaten. And what's with organic chips? Don't you think anything that fell into that vat of boiling grease wouldn't just get instantaneously zapped and stripped of all its toxicity? Don't you think deep fat fryer trumps pesticides?

1 comment:

Teri said...

Yep, I think deep fry trumps pesticides. I bet if you taped a piece of paper over "Organic" that said "Don't touch - MOM'S" they'd finish it off in one minute.